What Recession? The $160,000 Bar Tab

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When I was a college student living in Manhattan, it used to be “cool” to go “clubbing”—by about mid-way through sophomore year, though, my interest had waned almost completely.

Aside from the costs involved, and the rapid loss of hearing (you just can’t get the nuances of a Young Jeezy song unless it is played louder than a jet engine), there was the tiresome parade of superficial aspiring “socialites” bankrolled by forty-something rich dudes looking to play out the fantasy of Big Man on Campus. I think they just wanted the college life they never got to experience the first time around, pre-millionaire.

I assumed that these big fish, after seeing 401ks implode and real estate investments vanish, might have been instilled with a sense of humility.

Well, I was wrong (not the first time)! One of the unintended consequences of the bank bailout and the disgusting Wall Street bonuses that followed, is that there’s still plenty of money being spent in New York City clubs. But there’s one story of excess that really caught my eye and I had to share it.

Taek Jho Low, “a 20-something Wharton grad from Malaysia who has burned through hundreds of thousands of dollars at the city's hottest nightspots in the last three months -- and shows no signs of stopping,” according to The New York Post.

Here’s what we know about this fella (courtesy of the Post):

1. $160,000 bar tab at Avenue, which may sound unreasonable until you realize this was during Fashion Week. You know how that goes. Models and bottles. Yada yada.

2. Made 23 bottles of Cristal “suddenly appear” at actress Lindsay Lohan’s 23rd birthday party—because if there’s one thing she needs to get her life back on the right track, it is probably 23 bottles of alcohol.

3. Reportedly “enjoyed himself so much” at one night club in Southampton that he flew eight of the waitresses back home with him to Malaysia. Talk about taking the party with you!

4. Bodyguard. Low reportedly “lives at a $100,000-a-month apartment in the Park Imperial, on West 56th Street, home to James Bond actor Daniel Craig and Sean ‘P. Diddy’ Combs -- and he won't go anywhere, not even on the elevator, without at least one bodyguard.”

5. Literally nothing whatsoever is known about this mysterious man of means, except that he is completely awesome and allegedly flew actress Megan Fox to his birthday party in Las Vegas. Alrighty then.

I admit that my first impulse upon hearing about Low was to write a tired takedown piece: how dare this mysterious man spend so much, so ostentatiously, when many New Yorkers are hitting up the proverbial bread lines or—God forbid—moving back in with Mom and Dad in suburbs wholly devoid of bottle service, Sam Ronson appearances, and comped vodka sodas. But I’m not going to do that. It’s beneath me… and I’m kind of hoping he’ll read this and invite me to go out to party with him and his crew and let me document the entire night. Pretty please. Call me, Low.

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