Bye, Bye Bernie
Bernard Madoff believes Judge Denny Chin should go easy on him. We believe he's out of his mind.
In a letter to U.S. District Judge Denny Chin released Monday, Madoff's attorney Ira Sorkin cites "death threats" and "anti-Semitic e-mails" as reasons for leniency when the Ponzi schemer is sentenced Monday. Madoff has already admitted to stealing tens of billions from his clients, friends and family, not to mention Holocaust survivors, charities and colleges.
The tone of the victim statements "suggests a desire for a type of mob vengeance that, if countenanced here, would negate and render meaningless the role of the court," according to Sorkin.
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Madoff faces up to 150 years in prison after pleading guilty on March 12 to 11 felony counts including securities fraud and perjury. Sorkin's letter says 12 years in prison, slightly less than his life expectancy, will be sufficient punishment for the 71-year old swindler who "will speak to the shame he has felt and to the pain he has caused" this coming Monday.
Bernie feels bad? Oh man, he's breaking our hearts. You know what? They should let him go right now. He's learned his lesson and obviously shows remorse.
Just kidding.
Sorkin, who at one time was a Madoff investor, said a sentence of a dozen years in prison would acknowledge Madoff's voluntary surrender (c'mon, the jig was up), full acceptance of responsibility (yeah right), meaningful cooperation efforts (are you serious? where's the money and the accomplices?) and the nonviolent nature of his crime (tell it to the family of Rene-Thierry Magon de la Villehuchet who committed suicide after losing more than a billion of his investors' bucks to Madoff).
"A prison term of 12 years -- just short of an effective life sentence -- will sufficiently address the goals of deterrence, protecting the public and promoting respect for the law," Sorkin wrote.
We object counselor. Our respect for the law will only increase with the length of time Bernie spends behind bars.
Dumb-o-meter score: 70 -- Mercy for Madoff? Mercy me!
