5 Dumbest Things on Wall Street

Too Fat To Fly?

You know the old Wall Street maxim, "Bulls make money, bears make money and pigs get slaughtered"? Well, we have a Five Dumbest addendum: "And fat cats don't fly."

Lloyd Blankfein, chairman and chief executive officer of Goldman Sachs (Stock Quote: GS), John Mack, CEO of Morgan Stanley (Stock Quote: MS), and Richard Parsons, chairman of Citigroup (Stock Quote: C), phoned into a meeting with President Obama and the nation's top bankers on Monday after their flights were delayed because of fog in Washington.

Blankfein and Mack were reportedly stuck waiting for US Airways (Stock Quote: LCC) flights from New York's LaGuardia and Westchester airports, respectively, while Parsons "was delayed in New York," according to a Citigroup statement.

Come on, guys! Have you never heard of Amtrak? How about hitching a ride on Jamie Dimon's private jet? The JPMorgan Chase (Stock Quote: JPM) CEO made it to the White House on time, why couldn't you?

"I appreciate you guys calling in," Obama told the no-show bank executives on speaker phone as the session began at the White House. "I'm sorry that the flight got held up."

That was awfully forgiving of the president in our opinion, especially when these same execs arrived with time to spare last year when they were hastily summoned to Washington. Back then, of course, they were picking up TARP checks from former Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson, and neither rain nor sleet nor certainly not a little fog would have kept them from picking up taxpayer billions to save their own hides.

Then again, maybe President Obama felt a tinge of remorse after referring to Wall Street's elite as "fat-cat bankers" on 60 Minutes the night before the big powwow.

"America's banks received extraordinary assistance from American taxpayers to rebuild their industry, and now that they're back on their feet, we expect an extraordinary commitment from them to help rebuild our economy," Obama said after the meeting.

Wait a second. Could you repeat that, Mr. President? There seems to be a problem on the line and Wall Street can't hear you.

Dumb-o-meter score: 75: Goldman Sachs CEO is smart enough to make billions of dollars trading stocks, but is too dumb to check the weather report? Oh please.