Husband vs. Wife: Who Should Pay the Bills?

Mrs. Fuchs says: But Dr. Hilfer also pointed out that while he manages his private practice bill paying, his wife manages payment for her own art business. That means she has plenty of experience writing checks and managing expenses which, God knows, is what you need.

Mr. Fuchs says: Sez you. Anyhow, I’ll see your psychologist and raise you a financial planner: Jon Ten Haagen, of Ten Haagen Financial Group in Huntington. Mr. Ten Haagen, who has the best last name of any certified financial planner I’ve ever heard of, gets to the same area of compromise that Dr. Hilfer eventually did. He agrees that the downside of being an adult and playing no role in your family’s bill paying can be dire. If something awful happens to your spouse, you might be totally lost financially, or an easy mark for chiselers. At the same time, forcing a reluctant spouse to pay bills just for the sake of it is asking for trouble. However, the person who does pay the bills should make the time to talk to the more hesitant one about what they are paying and why. And the spouse who is not paying the bills should lend a patient ear. We have a lot to learn and it’s a small price to pay to avoid a seriously annoying monthly task.

Mrs. Fuchs says: I’ll be happy to meet you there. We won’t sit together and co-sign checks every month (or push the send button together, since it’s mostly done electronically.). But for our long term financial (and relational) health, we’ll sit together for at least a few minutes a month to discuss what we are paying and why.