Step 3: Do Something for Them

The art of the ask, experts said, is to make sure an exchange is mutually beneficial. Whether you send a note on a great golf coach, an article about the industry your contact works in or feedback about projects you've worked on together, you should be passing along some sort of information.

Ask how your contacts are and be alert to what they may need and what you can offer them.

"For all you know, they could have been recently laid off," said Mark Leathers, chairman of OI Partners-Leathers Milligan, a career counseling and coaching firm based in Phoenix.

Instead of asking contacts if they know about a job, ask for information about a certain company or industry, Leathers said. It's understood that if they know of a job, they'll tell you.

Step 4: Log Into a Network

Social networking sites like LinkedIn and Facebook can alleviate some anxiety about dropping a line to someone you were chummy with years ago.

But career counselors warn that online connections can seem impersonal, and that phone or face time is usually the best way to ask for a favor. Use networking sites to make the initial contact, then try and set up a short appointment or phone call.

Don't send a mass e-mail or generic message. At the same time, keep it short: "It's been a long time since we've worked together at Company XYZ, and I thought I'd reconnect with you." Don't ask for help right away, but wait until they respond or accept your request to connect.

Step 5: Say Thank You

Personal touches like thank you cards will show you appreciate the help and also keep you at the front of someone's mind. Forgetting to follow up could make them forget about you when a job pops up.

When you've finally got the job, thank them. And once you land on your feet, don't forget to take calls from your own ghosts of jobs past, Leathers said.

"Everyone wants everyone's time," Leathers said. "If we offer help to people, we get treated the same way. We never know when we'll need it."